If you are hungry, you eat. Tired, you sleep. Thirsty, you drink. Lonely, you make a friend or find ways to connect with others. Constipated, you take laxative. I think you get it.
Blogging, why?
What was the ailment I had to start me a blogging? Why is it I can't blog or do some of the easiest things in life.
Extreme Anxiety!
Yup! I got it and have had it for two years it's called Menopause and I don't get hot flashes so therefore I should be grateful and not complain, right?
We (when I say we I mean me and my analogy) have determined that blogging is a way for me to escape. My metaphors are not always the best used at the best times - but hey it's my blog and I've decided that because I have menopause and the result of that is anxiety big time I'm going to use the words that come to mind.
A synopsis - I have Menopause. My symptoms of menopause is simple I have anxiety. Anxiety can be either a short term 'state' or a long term "trait". For me it has become a long term trait.
I try and face things head on, that doesn't work.
Most times I give up turn the other way and avoid doing things I like to do or they take me foooorrrrrrrreeeeeevvvvveeeerrrrr to do.
So I'm going to come here and talk about it. Why? Because I'm in pain and blogging for me is an escape. Sometimes I think I'm the only who has anxiety because everyone blogs all these coloured flowery blog posts and meanwhile my anxiety is so high it causes fear, constipation, anger, avoidance, or sometimes a feeling like I have to run, run as fast as I can and not look back because myself - the problem may be catching up to me. I have no where to run, if I tell you I've got anxiety, I'm on this long road trip because our little tea room became popular just when we were about to retire, we had a overly busy summer that my daughter worked for 4 days and said "never again, this is crazy mom", hubby and I needed time away so we planned a road trip across Canada, where we are in close confined quarters, I can't operate this unusual foreign tablet, I want to blog and have trouble, I look for things to do so I tried to knit, to read, to look out the window, just something to try and relax, regenerate, and rejuvenate so I can return to Prince Edward Island and face work that causes me anxiety because I have menopause and run on sentences.
Face the fear, fix what is broken and do them one at a time. First things first..... my glasses, a spec of dirt on them causes me frustration. So That is what I fixed today, I walked into the eye glass store and met wmLisa, we connected over a spec of dust on my glasses that I was needing to remove so I can see clearer to sit in this confined RV and continue the drive across Canada without being able to knit or read because I have anxiety so bad I can't relax enough to read. Simple don't read just keep cleaning my lenses and thinking about wmLisa because she knew I had menopause and a gun in my back pocket and when I said I have a sensitivity, causing me anxiety because my glasses are dirty and the doctor said I need to find "Grace" in my life, she said "what does he know he is a man and will never get menopause", then she told me how she has been feeling and I listened like I don't need to run anymore because someone was running with me not away from me. I made a menopausal friend today and I feel great.
So why the Eagle? I was reading someone's blog (memory is also a problem) she will remind me I hope. Anyway she was talking about Hawk Cliff Cove. I finished reading and commented, just as I did this Hawk landed on the fence post just beside the RV. Odd, you might think but these coincidences and happenings come to me all the time, they don't cause me anxiety.
Just so you know, I've never seen a hawk or eagle. Sure I've seen an Eagle in a nest on top of a hydro post while driving but never this close up.
I think my lenses are clean, it's 11am, hubby is waiting we need to get on the road.
Until we connect next,
Cindy
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